How do you feel your way to happiness? What does that mean exactly? No one feels happy every moment of the day, do they? Is it possible to feel happiness consistently no matter what is going on in your life?
The possibility to find the happy part of your day and make it the majority is a lot higher than you think. Developing the ability to focus on the good and happy portions of your day is not as difficult as you may think it is.
As with anything new feeling, your way to happiness seems unlikely. You may have even tried but still, end up aggravated or upset by the end of the day. There are some key tricks to help you develop the ability.
How do you Feel your Way to Happiness?
How do you feel right now? Learning how to focus on what you are feeling. If you are feeling anxious or pressure in your chest or stomach, Pause. What are you thinking? What you are thinking will affect you physically.
Determining what you are feeling will be the first indicator that something is off in your thinking. Learn to acknowledge the fact that your thoughts are very important to your overall well-being. Your mind is a very powerful tool.
Mind over matter is truer than you think. You can use your thoughts to improve your mood and level of happiness. You can also find yourself a prisoner of your thoughts if you dwell on the negative.
Develop the power to observe your thoughts and use them to set yourself up for success. Your thoughts do not have to rule your emotions. You can learn to use your emotions to stop a negative thought process.
How do you change how you feel
When you find yourself not feeling happy pause and ask yourself why. Even when there are things in your life that are not the happiest going on you do not have to focus on them. I am not suggesting you ignore what you are feeling.
I am, however, asking, are you focusing on the negative? Are you dwelling on negative thoughts? Why? Are they serving you? You need to know what you are feeling but you can also learn to control your focus.
There is no reason to relive negative thoughts. Look at them for what they are and let them go. You do not have to replay them, or talk about them, or justify them. It is a habitual process to justify why you are sad, angry, or anxious. Change your thoughts and change how you feel.
If you have a thought that causes a feeling you do not like. Look at it and ask yourself why. Do you need to adjust your belief about something? What about the thought is troublesome? Face the catch and release the energy.
Take control of what you are feeling. If you do not like how you are feeling. Change what you are thing about or how you are thinking about it. Find happier thoughts. Counting your blessings is the easiest way to start the process of changing how you are feeling. The silver lining is always there if you challenge yourself to find it.
Take Responsibility for your Feelings
No one can make you feel anything unless you give them the power. They can do whatever they like but how you react is totally in your power. Finding yourself in a reactionary position with someone means you are not in control of your feelings.
You are allowing someone else determines how you will feel. Happiness comes from within. Always! Giving that power to anyone limits you and places an unfair burden on the other person.
You can not always understand why people do what they do so how can you honestly react? No matter how much you observe, you can not truly understand, unless someone wants to invest the time into clarifying their perspective.
You can understand why you are being triggered if you take the time to look within. Do you need to update something in your belief structure? Is there an issue from your past causing you to react unnecessarily?
Once you realize what has you reacting you can begin to change how you think and feel. It is okay to release the negative from your life and only focus on the positive. You do not even need to explain it to anyone. Just choose happiness.
Take Control of your Inner Critic
Do you know that voice in your head that talks to you every day? We all have one. That intuitive voice can be very disparaging. The one who says” I told you so”. Ya, her.
Make friends with her. Heck, give her a name if you must. Just take the time to realize that she can affect your mood also. How you talk to yourself sets the tone for how others will talk to you also.
Taking the time to train yourself to talk your way to a positive solution for anything. You can train yourself to find the silver lining by changing the way you speak to yourself.
Stop setting yourself up for failure by saying things like “I told you so”. Your brain will look for things to prove you right. You will find yourself doing things that lead you to your expected outcome.
Once you learn to take control of your self-talk you can learn to use it to your advantage. You can start setting yourself up for success.
You are Responsible for your Happiness
Once you accept that your happiness is your responsibility you will become more proactive about how you feel. Learning to take charge of your feelings and realize that it is okay to focus on happiness.
You do not have to be sad, angry, or upset. Choose to move forward faster by finding the silver lining and letting it go. You do not have to share your negative experiences. You do not have to relive it over and over.
Learn to relive the happy events in your life. Relive the things that make you smile and laugh. Focus on things that make you happy. It is not the norm, I know. But that does not mean it is wrong.
You would not let some stranger spend the money in your bank account at will. So, don’t give them the power over your energy. That is your personal bank account. Protect it. Nurture it. When you do not feel happy, take the time to fix it.
Shut off media, unplug and ground yourself. Take the necessary steps to change what you are thinking. Take a nap if necessary. Make how you feel a key indicator of what you need to do to find your happiness.
With practice, it will get easier. You will be able to change your focus to a happier thought faster with every attempt. Just don’t give up trying. You are with it! Now how do you feel? I sure hope it is happier than when you started to read.
Have a blessed day, y’all,
Peggie Sue | The Midlife Dream Life Coach